The Good Thing About Being So Bad

Five Alarm fire in Chicago

In the latest installment of This Team Is Horribly Bad may I present to you the 2024 Chicago White Sox.

First, the bad news: The White have a record of 28-89, have a run differential of -248, and sit 40.5 games out of first place in the AL Central.

The White Sox are almost certain to break the major league franchise record for 106 losses set by the New York Mets in 1970. To avoid breaking that mark, they'd have to finish the season by winning 60% of their games. Their current winning percentage is .239.

They are on pace to finish 38-124, which would be the most losses since the 1899 Cleveland Spiders of the National League went 20-134. They have been held to one run or fewer 32 times.

They recently snapped their American League record-tying losing streak at 21 games by beating the Oakland Athletics 5-1 on August 6th. The major league record since 1900 is held by the 1961 Philadelphia Phillies, who lost 23 straight.

To put it mildly, the 2024 Chicago White Sox are awful on a cosmic level. When this putrid season is over, Chicago will join the infamous pantheon of the truly terrible but this brings us to the good news because, if you’re gonna fail, fail on the most epic of levels and leave little doubt as to how truly horrible your team is.

Congratulations, you’re now part of a very exclusive club: the collection of teams that were so bad, they both define an era and defy description.

Like the NHL's 1975 Washington Capitals who finished with a 8-67-5 record although, to be fair, it was their first season as an expansion team so the immediate despair is a little more acceptable.

The Ottawa Senators had the same misfortune in their first season back in the NHL in 1992-93 when they went 10–70–4.

“Give us a break, we’re an expansion team” would also be the excuse used by the 1976 Tampa Bay Buccaneers who finished their first season winless at 0-14 that turned into 26 straight losses over two combined seasons.

While the Bucs weren't competitive on the field, off of it they were certainly entertaining. At least their Head Coach, John McKay was.

During that first horrendous stretch a reporter asked McKay what he thought of his team's execution, to which McKay replied, “I’m in favour of it.”

From darkness, can shine glimmers of light.

How about the ugliness of being really bad in college football?

Exhibit A: The Prairie View A&M Panthers were one of the worst college football programs of all time. Between 1989 and 1998 the school set a record for consecutive losses with an 80-game losing streak. Eighty games in a row. In 1991 Prairie View scored a total of 48 points for the entire season.

And the worst team in any sport, ever? Probably the 1899 Cleveland Spiders, for those of beyond elderly (or owning a time machine). In 1899 the Spiders went 20-134.

This is where the Chicago White Sox - despite enduring an utterly pathetic season need reminding of how truly blessed they are for they are entering into the spellbinding realm of immortality. Well beyond reality, the White Sox have brought losing to an art form. In fact, they have raised, er lowered, the bar considerably.

This is not a feeble attempt putting a positive spin on this train wreck of a season. This is legitimately how you will be remembered.

The irony that naturally comes with teams who perform this poorly is that while the team may enter immortality, the players who made this possible, remain essentially anonymous.

No one - other than true baseball nerds - will remember the name of the 2024 White Sox catcher or the number 2 pitcher.

A team that finishes this bad is the product of legendary celestial misfortune. They aren't losing over a hundred games because their shortstop had a down year - they're well beyond personnel moves and roster tweaks - and you can’t help but feel the presence of divine intervention.

If you are a player on this dysfunctional version of the Chicago White Sox sure, you can be a little embarrassed but generating results this epically bad runs far deeper than the simple missteps of some players or the team's lack of big league talent.

You may never admit it publicly but you will have become a member of a select club.

Hear that? That’s immortality knocking on your door.

You can be sure that years from now no one will remember who lost the 2024 World Series but they sure as hell will remember the 2024 Chicago White Sox.